Thursday, December 30, 2010

11 Resolutions for 2011

I wanted to have a major major year-ender special however, laziness has once again taken its toll. So I settled with posting my resolutions which I am hoping to fulfill in the coming year.

1. Strengthen your faith.

2. Study more.

3. Develop that body.

4. Be more responsible.

5. Lose laziness.

6. Care for your health.

7. Fulfill your promises.

8. Be honest.

9. Be optimistic.

10. Be passionate with your passions.

11. Save money.

Resolutions are not compulsory by the way.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Post-Christmas Wishes

Naughty or nice, everyone deserves to make Christmas wishes. And even though Santa has already left town, I'm pretty sure he'll find time to fill my empty stockings-I've been EXTREMELY nice this year.

Anyway, here are my heart yearnings:
I wish for a bucketful of happiness. I wish for world peace and world domination. I wish for a cornucopia of good health and good luck. I wish for faces filled with smiles and laughter. I wish for springs and summers. I wish for a carpet full of butterflies. I wish for flowered bicycles-in blue roses and purple sunflowers. I wish for pumpkin carriages and glass slippers. I wish for a magic lamp. I wish for magenta seas and pink oceans. And finally I wish for Cupid to finally slap me.
I hope Santa grants these just before the year ends, but I have no complains if I receive them next year. There's just one problem though, we don't have a chimney.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Going Positive/ Laziness

So after our RS exams, Sagittarius, Cheese and I had this talk about life and lessons learned along the way. The mushroom felt like the most unfitting place for such a conversation but we had the talk of the century there and it was worth it.

Cheese and I were somewhat similar since we both struggled with insecurities whilst growing up. Sagittarius on the other hand talked about divine interventions and how prayer has made her optimistic.

I feel sooo enlightened that I decided that I should go for positivity. Life is too short for pessimistic thoughts and I'd rather worry about my weight than my wrinkles.

. . . . .

All of us have lazy days and today is one of mine. I wanted to write about GKaR, and Iceberg and Kev and Earl and C but I feel like a sloth so I'll leave this as is at the moment. Someday when I feel less Juan-Tamad-ish, I'll definitely grab a pen. Oh well, XOXO.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

And the Breather Materialized

And *poof it did materialize. This is definitely far from the un-emo post I imagined but this will do for now.

I wrote this as a reflection prayer for our RS subject [Christian Prayers]. Maria and I decide to post our RS write-ups on our blog.

Assignment: Deadline Wednesday, NOv. 24, 2010. [nilagyan pa talaga-LOLz] Describe an incident form your childhood that had a profound effect on when and how you pray now.

As a child, I always wished that summers were endless. The fun of playing , exploring* and the idea of summer itself brings a zest of energy to my veins that whenever I think of the three school-less months, I was always excited.

Oo, may pagka-Dora the Explorer din ako noon.

It was one particular May morning and I woke up filled with the excitement of rolling over the fields or finally having my revenge against the street bullies. I'm not exactly a trouble maker but I am the 'lampayatot' kid-the chicken in our gang.

I remembered a hot blazing sun that day which thrilled me more. I sat at our front porch and waited for my friends. I was probably bored and grew impatient of waiting that I finally asked my mother why there weren't any kids outside.

"They all went to church Jom (my pet name). It's Flores de Mayo. Don't you want to go there too?" she retorted.*

May dialogue pa talaga ha. I laughed after typing that line. This IS too much for a reflection paper.

Church? I remember the dark pillars and funny looking people. It was a boring place to go and I wondered why my friends were there. I ran to church that instant. To my surprise, it was certainly far from what I expected. The altar was decorated with flowers and children of all ages were there, they too, carrying flowers.One of my friends approached me and said that we were going to be classmates. I wanted to ask her why she was here but I was too astounded that I kept silent.

We sat next to each other in one of the mahogany benches and listened to our teacher as she taught us the story of Adam and Eve and other stuff. She was a teenager and I thought she probably didn't know what she was talking about (I was rather sinister then-hehe).

After the lessons we participated in the rosary and I prayed fervently to God that He will bring back the summer that I imagined. He didn't answer my prayer. I went back the next day and the day after that mostly because of the snacks but I became tired that eventually I stopped going.

Church to me then was boring and people only go because they are obliged or because they are given something in return (e.g. snacks)*. But as I grew up, I became aware of its importance,. Only then did I realize why God didn't answer my prayer that day.

I realized that Flores de Mayo isn't just a lame excuse to forbid children from basking in the sun. It actually trains children to become citizens of God; teaches the values of the religion; and promotes the art of prayer.

This childhood experience humbled me.

Hahaha. This is one weird post. Regrets. Regrets. Regrets.

Need a Breather

It's nice to take a breather from the past emo write-ups that I've posted. It'll be monotonous to make this blog just for those moments. I wanted to post something interesting and funny but that won't materialize right now. I'm still traumatized over our prelim exams. Anyway, I'll definitely post something un-emo soon. I hope.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Sick and Emo

I'm sick. My throat is aching , my nose wants to remove itself from my face, and I'm dying to die, yet here I am-in school, just answered a brain-breaking psychology exam while trying to breath at the same time.

. . . . .

Life is hellish all of a sudden. But the hardest part, amidst all these, you're still knocking in my head. Like a million whistles. Like a million car honks. You never fail to capture my attention.

I would have liked this if you are mine. But you're not. And again, I feel clogged with mucus, pain and longing.

. . . . .

Life sucks.

When I breath, I feel pain. When I don't breath, I die. What am I going to do?

. . . . .

You're a puzzle I can never answer. You're like accounting, you're difficult.

. . . . .

This is cheesy and I think I'd prefer dying.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Writing Emotions

I am a very emotional person. That would have been advantageous on my part but i haven't perfected the art of fusing this in my works. So far what I've done is scribble a few words here and there, trying to make sense out of something utterly nonsense.

I miss you.
I miss the way you say you miss me too.
Then I'd smile pretending I didn't know you were lying.
You'd smile too and mess my hair.
Sometimes you'd cradle my face and kiss me. Gently. Sweetly.
I'd kiss you back unable to prevent myself. I know I've fallen. I wanted to fly, keep my distance, but I couldn't. It's too strong to resist.
Somehow, soon, I know I'd crumble rock bottom.
I wish you'd catch me.
"Please catch me."
Do you hear that? I often whisper that to you when you're asleep.
I'd run my fingers through your hair and kiss you again-thinking it might be the last time i could do it.
I'd hold back my tears and wish you weren't lying.

I won't say it's bad, that would be an insult to modesty. There's definitely something in there that needs polishing and I need to figure that out.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

The Pink Skeleton

Once upon a time I found a pink skeleton in my closet. It was blue and dusty and dirty so I kept it there, locked the closet and swallowed the key.

Time passed and although I try to forget it, I couldn't. It often makes loud noises whenever I think about it. It’s like it could read my mind. Sometimes I see the dark hollow eyes peeping through the closet door. Sometimes it would escape and sleep in my bed and I would once again drag it back into the closet and swallow another key.

Although it’s been annoying me for quite some time and I have grown accustomed to its company. One time it climbed on my back, and because I didn't want to swallow another key, I let it dangle there.

One day, it approached me. It was previously hanging out with its skeleton friends from other closets. "What do you want?” I asked. It looked at me. I realized that it had no thyroid glands so I took a pen and paper and lent these to it.

"Release me", he wrote. I could hear the carpals and metacarpals clicking. I asked why. I didn't ask it to hang out with me. And besides, can't it go on its own?

And with great effort, it wrote, "Butterflies never fly unless they let go if their cocoons."
I smiled-my nonchalant smile. "I guess I’ll never learn how to fly". And it, for once, walked back into the closet.